You always hear that it’s important to give it your all in a relationship- your 100%. Sometimes there’s the exaggeration of giving it your 110% or even 150%, which is actually impossible unless you’re dealing with volume, but this isn’t meant to be a science lesson. Instead, with relationships, I think you should give it your full 50%.

I always say the problem with a relationship is that it involves another person. Many people would love to be in a relationship with someone where they’re always in control and things tend to go their way. However, more realistically, it’s a partnership where both parties need to be considered. So, what does that mean if a person is set on things being one way, or if there are certain things about the other person that drives them crazy? It means that when you consider a partnership to be 100%, and you are only one of the parties involved, that you can only do your full 50% since your part is the only one you have any control over.

This is where things can get tricky because there is a fine line between compatibility and codependency. However, if you’re either not doing your part or are overcompensating for your partner’s lack of doing theirs, then something is off. This runs the risk of no longer being in a healthy relationship. It is something that can continue in the same relationship for years, or get easily passed to subsequent relationships as it becomes a pattern.

If you feel that the percentages are not equal in your relationship, or are starting to realize that you end up in the same relationship over and over again with different people, please call STA at (201) 488-6678. We can help properly align your numbers by balancing out the relationship you have with yourself first.