There are so many influences in life that affect our thoughts, feelings, actions, and choices we make, that we often lose sight of our own identity.  To be authentic means representing one’s true nature or beliefs.  Many of use lose track of who we are authentically because we have tried so hard to be what others want or expect from us.  Self-esteem involves knowing and accepting our authentic self.  Therefore in order to have a healthy self-esteem, it is essential that we become in touch with our true self – who we were before it was influenced by other peoples opinions.


The messages we receive from society, family and peers can blur our own sense of self.  It causes us to think judgmentally, and act in ways that are not true to ourselves.  Think about the 11 year old boy who plays baseball because of his father’s dream of his becoming a pro baseball player.  The high school student, who joins the school play because all her friends are in it.  The businessman, who buys a BMW because society says it’s a symbol of his success.  Throughout our lives we are being manipulated by the judgments and messages that we receive; it makes it difficult to know who we are and why we are doing something.


The path toward our authentic self is to become aware of how we are thinking and what we are saying to ourselves.  It is a willingness to see reality without judgment.   Having a healthy self-esteem begins with knowing yourself.  When you know who you are, and feel good about yourself, you could accomplish just about anything.

If you want to learn more about healthy self-esteem and counseling services, call us at Specialized Therapy Associates (201) 488-6678 or visit our website at