The Coronavirus (COVID-19) has had an affect on the mental health of adults, children, and teenagers. Socialization with friends and peers has been limited because of the quarantine, causing many teenagers to feel isolated and withdrawn. Now that teenagers are returning to school, the affect of COVID-19 on their mental health is even more apparent. Many activities including sports have been postponed or cancelled. Students are unable to socialize with their friends at school due to safety precautions, and some schools remain all-virtual during this time.

Many of these changes can cause teenagers to appear sad, down, disappointed, and angry or irritable. If your teenager’s mood has changed, you may be wondering how to tell the difference between sadness and clinical depression. It is valid to  have concerns about your child’s mental health during this stressful time.

 Signs and Symptoms of Depression in Teens

1. Social isolation and withdrawal. Be aware if your teen has started to isolate from family, friends and peers.
2. Negative self-talk and self-criticism. Listen to what your teen is saying. If they are making negative self-statements such as “I’m a failure,” “Everything I do is wrong,” or “I’m useless,” this could be a sign of depression.
3. Hopeless self-talk. Similarly, be aware if your teen is making hopeless statements such as “What’s the point” or “I just can’t do this anymore.”
4. Academic changes or decline. Another sign of depression may be a decline in academic performance.
5. Physical complaints, such as headaches and stomachaches, can be connected to depression.
6. Increase in reckless behaviors, including substance use. Teenagers who struggle with mental health disorders may be more likely to self-medicate using substances or engaging in other impulsive behaviors.

Talking to Your Teen About Mental Health

1. Validate, Validate, Validate. It is important to let your teenager know that you can understand things have been hard. Let them know that if you were in their shoes, you might feel the same way. Express your love, care and concern.
2. Ask them how they are feeling. Don’t make assumptions about what your observe. Encourage your teen to use ‘feeling words’ such as  ‘sad,’ ‘mad’ or ‘worried.’
3. Stick to the facts and be specific. Let your child know what symptoms and behaviors concern you. Ask them if they have noticed the same concerns. You can also ask them what they think about a particular concern (i.e. ‘I noticed your grade went from an A to a C, what do you think is going on there?’).
4. Let your child know that you want to speak to them, and choose a day and time together. This can allow them to feel they are participating in the conversation, and can also help them feel more prepared for a conversation.

 Getting Help and Support

Helping your teenager get help and support can be an important part of showing your care for them. Teenagers may want to speak to an objective person about their problems, such as a therapist or counselor. You can explore support services at your teenager’s school, such as school counselors or a Student Assistance Counselor (SAC). It can be very helpful to find a therapist for your child to speak to as well. Keep in mind that if you have safety concerns for your child, or if they are making statements about self-harm or suicide, then it is recommended for you to bring your child to a local emergency room to keep them safe.

PerformCare NJ offers a list of treatment resources and support resources for youth, parents and caregivers. You can visit their website here: PerformCare NJ Resources

The New Jersey Hopeline is a 24/7, confidential peer support and suicide prevention hotline. Hotline specialists can provide youth and family with resources and referrals for additional help during a challenging time. The phone number is 1-855-654-6735.

2nd Floor Youth Helpline is a 24/7 helpline available to youth ages 10-24, to provide support and to help come up with solutions to problems. 2nd Floor can be reached by phone or text message at 1-888-222-2222.

If you would like more information about therapy treatment services for your teenager, or for family therapy, please contact Specialized Therapy Associates at (201)-488-6678 to make an appointment. You can also visit us online at Specialized Therapy.

The post Mental Health and COVID-19: How to Talk to Teens About it first appeared on Specialized Therapy.

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 Loneliness During a Pandemic

Over the past few months, we’ve heard the term ‘social distancing’ and the importance of keeping a 6-foot distance from others, to reduce the risk of spreading the coronavirus. Many of us have practiced social distancing to keep ourselves, our families, and others safe. Some have had to adhere to social distancing and self-isolation due to contracting coronavirus or suspecting they have been in contact with someone who has had it. Many of us have not been prepared to cope with feelings of loneliness resulting from a loss of connection with others. This can cause us to feel isolated. Research on loneliness has found significant associations between social isolation and poorer mental health outcomes, such as depression and anxiety.

Although some restrictions regarding social distancing have been lifted, it can still be difficult to cope with feelings of isolation during this time. Here are some strategies to cope with isolation and loneliness.

Coping Strategies to reduce Isolation and Loneliness

• Stay active and go outside
  • Exercise in ways that feel safe for you during the day. Brief periods of exercise can boost mental health.
  • Yoga has benefits for both the mind and body. Yoga can help you practice being mindful of the present.
  • Go outside to take a walk around the block, or find a local park where you can remain socially distanced.

• Connect with Others
  • Phone calls, text messages, or emails are great ways to stay in touch with friends and family members. Consider using Zoom or Facetime to connect with loved ones visually. There are benefits to seeing others  “face-to-face.”
  • Send mail to family members and friends. Sending an old-fashioned letter is a great way to feel connected, and receiving one in return feels even better.
  • Be creative in connecting with others! Agree to read the same book or watch the same movie with friends, and then set up a Zoom call to discuss it.
  • Explore online connections. Social media sources, such as Facebook, have online groups for a variety of topics you may be interested in. Consider online classes in your community or online exercise classes where you can interact with the instructor and other students.

• Keep a schedule and structure
  • Have a plan each day including a few things you want to accomplish that day. Keep your list realistic and achievable.
  • Practice normal self-care habits such as getting up, showering, getting dressed, and so forth. Doing these things will help you feel that your day is more “normal.”

• Think about future plans
  • Develop a ‘goals’ list of things you want to accomplish going forward in your life.
  • Think about fun plans or events after the quarantine is over.
  • Engaging in these activities can increase hopefulness.

• Distract yourself and practice Self-Soothing
  • Take a bath, light a candle, play with a pet, watch your favorite movie…do something soothing.
  • Listen to music or soothing sounds, such as ocean waves
  • Play puzzle games, or online games where you can interact with other players.
  • Write in a journal
  • Do a creative project such as painting, drawing, or building something

 Seeking Additional Help

When you find yourself struggling with isolation and loneliness, consider the benefits of talking to a licensed professional. Not only will this help you feel a sense of connection. Talking to a professional can help you feel accepted, validated, and supported. A therapist can help you to learn and practice coping skills and strategies to combat loneliness.

If you or someone you know could benefit from seeking professional help, call Specialized Therapy Associates today at (201)-488-6678. One of our intake specialists can help connect you with a licensed professional who can best meet your needs.

The post Preventing Isolation in a time of Social Distancing first appeared on Specialized Therapy.

The post Preventing Isolation in a time of Social Distancing appeared first on Specialized Therapy.

Sobriety is an ongoing process that requires a daily commitment to recovery goals. Those in recovery know that it is essential to have a strong support system to maintain sobriety. This is especially true for those who are in early recovery. Other factors that help individuals in recovery include having daily structure and positive routines. Due to the COVID-19 pandemic, and subsequent quarantine, social connections, and daily routines have been interrupted. When daily structure changes and there are increases in stress and anxiety, there are higher risks for relapse. Here are some tips to help you succeed in your sobriety during this challenging time.

Tips for Sobriety

(1) Utilize online recovery resources. Although in-person support groups and 12-step meetings have been put on hold, there are a variety of online resources, including:

1. 1. Alcoholics Anonymous
   2. Narcotics Anonymous 
   3. SMART Recovery
   4. In The Rooms: Global Recovery Community
   5. Recovery Dharma

(2) Stay connected with your support network. Choose a time every day to check-in with your sponsor, sober support, or a supportive friend or family member. Connecting with someone who supports you, even if only for a few minutes, can help you feel connected with others. Even if you are struggling and you don’t want to share that with a friend or family member, reach out anyway. Having a sense of connection is very beneficial, and talking with someone else (about anything at all) provides a positive distraction and a way to reduce urges or thoughts to use substances.

(3) Develop daily routines and have a sense of structure. Make a list of 2 or 3 goals for yourself each day. Then, make a list of 3 or 4 tasks that will help you accomplish each goal. Next, assign a time to each task during the day. Having a plan for the day will help you remain focused and feel productive. Don’t forget to incorporate enjoyable hobbies into your daily schedule as well, such as taking a walk, playing with a pet, dancing in your living room, or watching a favorite TV show.

(4) Practice Mindfulness. This involves focusing on one thing at a time, or one day at a time. Bring your awareness into the here-and-now. There are several free mindfulness and guided meditation apps that you can search for in your app store.

• Use your senses to focus on the present. Look around you and identify three objects and what color they are. Name one thing you can see, hear, touch, smell, and taste. Dig your heels into the floor and think about how that feels in your body.
• Focus on your breath. Breathe in while counting to 4, and take a slow breath out while counting to 6 or 8.
• Engage in a Progressive Muscle Relaxation exercise.

Getting Help

(5) Seek additional help and support from a professional during this time.

If you or someone you know is struggling with substance abuse and maintaining sobriety, reach out for help with a professional. You don’t have to go through it alone. Specialized Therapy Associates is currently providing telehealth services including sessions that can be held over the phone or through confidential video conference sessions. We can work with you to make sure you can work with a professional who best meets your needs. Please contact our intake office for scheduling and more information at (201)-488-6678. We look forward to helping you today.

The post Tips for Sobriety During Quarantine first appeared on Specialized Therapy.

The post Tips for Sobriety During Quarantine appeared first on Specialized Therapy.

Gender identity and expression are key elements to the way a child or teen perceives themselves and the world around them. For transgender children and teens, acceptance and support from family is essential.

Research has shown that support from family can reduce the risk of anxiety, depression, and substance abuse in trans children and teens. Furthermore, family support can prevent suicide and self-injurious behaviors. Familial support can help reduce the impact of bullying that a transgender child or teen may experience socially.

What is Gender Dysphoria?

Gender dysphoria is not considered a mental illness. Gender dysphoria means that a person identifies as a gender that is not the same as the gender they were assigned at birth. Transgender teens and adults often experience a feeling of disconnect between their assigned gender and how they identify themselves. This gender dysphoria can cause emotional pain. This is especially true when their feelings are not understood or validated by others.

5 Ways to Support your Transgender Child or Teen

1. Express unconditional love and support to your child.
2. Advocate for your child to promote a safe and secure environment at home and at school.
3. Encourage your child to advocate for themselves.
4. Educate yourself about supporting your transgender child. Explore resources and support groups.
5. Use the preferred gender pronouns and names for your child (ask them!)

More Resources

The Trevor Project provides multiple resources to support LGBTQ youth.
PFLAG supports the families, friends and allies of LGBTQ people and provides information on support groups around the country.
The Human Rights Campaign provides a transgender children and youth page.

For additional support, consider seeking therapy services for yourself, your family, or your child. For information about therapy services, please contact Specialized Therapy Services Intake department at (201)-488-6678 or contact us online at Specialized Therapy Associates.

The post Why is Familial Support Important for Transgender Youth? first appeared on Specialized Therapy.

The post Why is Familial Support Important for Transgender Youth? appeared first on Specialized Therapy.

Staying sober can be especially difficult around the holiday season when there are so many events and parties. These kinds of situations can cause stress, triggering thoughts or urges to use substances. Sobriety becomes even more challenging when drugs or alcohol are present at these events. Getting through the holiday season may seem daunting, but here are some tips to celebrate yourself in recovery this holiday season.

Tips for being Sober during the Holiday Season

• Make healthy choices about the events you choose to attend. If you know that a particular party or gathering will be centered around drinking or substances, choose not to go. Attend an event instead that’s more centered around sober activities with friends and family.
• When attending a party or event, ask the host if they can provide non-alcoholic beverages. If you feel uncomfortable asking about it, it’s alright to bring your own non-alcoholic beverages like seltzers or sodas. Having a safe beverage to sip on can help you feel less excluded.
• Avoid being the designated driver! While this may seem helpful, it can cause you to feel stuck at a party waiting for a friend when you’re ready to leave. If you do agree to drive, let friends know in advance that you may need to leave. If they’re not ready to go, they will need to find alternate ways to get home such as public transport or car services.
• Bring a sober friend or support to holiday events that may be triggering for you. If you have a sponsor, let them know in advance about the event you’re attending so you can call him or her if you need support.
• Have an escape plan. When you attend a gathering, become aware of where exits are in case you need to step away for a break. You can also go into a bathroom to take space to breathe or splash some water on your face to cool down.
• Commit yourself to abstinence. If you have one celebratory drink, like a glass of champagne, this can lower your inhibitions and your perception. This will make it more difficult to control substance use behaviors afterward.

Take on a New Perspective

Focus on celebrating yourself and your recovery during the holiday season. It’s a special time to take pride in yourself and your accomplishments. Challenge yourself to think more about what you’re gaining when you’re sober rather than what you feel you’re giving up. When you’re not drinking or drugging, you’re more present and engaged in activities with your spouse, your friends, and your family. You will maintain more positive memories during this time when you are sober.

For information on therapy and counseling for substance abuse and recovery, contact Specialized Therapy Associates at (201)-488-6678, or visit us online at Specialized Therapy Associates.

The post Sobriety and the Holidays: Tips for the Season first appeared on Specialized Therapy.

The post Sobriety and the Holidays: Tips for the Season appeared first on Specialized Therapy.

Rewards and Consequences

Set up some rewards for yourself if you complete tasks or chores you have been avoiding. For example, if you complete that project in school, treat yourself by watching your favorite TV show or go out with your friends. When you finish the chores around the house, treat yourself to a unique dinner or snack. Rewards need to be realistic and achievable to be most effective.

Although it sounds difficult to set up consequences for yourself, it is doable. Try limiting yourself to a fun task if you don’t complete an important job. If you have difficulty keeping yourself accountable, you can ask a friend, parent, spouse, or your therapist to help you.

Ending Procrastination Now

First, identify the best times for yourself to complete a task or chore you’ve been avoiding. If you know your optimal time for working is at night, set up a time in the evening to complete your assignments. If you find yourself getting stuck in patterns of procrastinating after work, set up an activity as soon as you get home to break this cycle such as going for a walk.

Secondly, break down large tasks into smaller steps. Identify the very first, smallest step towards your goal. When we have a large task in front of us, it can be overwhelming. This can make us avoid it altogether. Yet, if you can take one small step at a time, you will find yourself moving forward with your tasks more easily. Goals should be specific rather than general, which will help you focus more on one task at a time. For example, if your goal is to ‘finish my research paper,’ start with a more specific goal for the first step, such as ‘write an introduction paragraph’ or ‘gather my resources.’

Counseling and therapy can assist you in the process of addressing reasons for procrastination and can help you best utilize these strategies.

If you would like more information about making a change to feel healthier, contact Specialized Therapy Associates at (201)-488-6678 or visit us online at specializedtherapy. We look forward to hearing from you!

The post Putting an End to Procrastination (no, don’t do it tomorrow) first appeared on Specialized Therapy.

The post Putting an End to Procrastination (no, don’t do it tomorrow) appeared first on Specialized Therapy.

Self-care can include all of these things, but part of self-care is also assessing what we need for ourselves and putting our own needs before the needs of others. That is why it is important to say ‘no’ to others when you need to. It can be hard to say ‘no’ but when you need to be true to your own needs, it can be so beneficial.

How Does Saying ‘No’ Help?

First, saying ‘no’ is a way to set important, healthy boundaries with others. It can be a way to identify what is most important to us. It can also help us to acknowledge and cut-out toxic relationships we may have in our lives.

Second, we can achieve good work-life balance by saying ‘no.’ If you boss, manager, or a consumer asks you to complete a task that is out of your comfort zone, or if the expectations are unrealistic, you can find a way to say ‘no’ by expressing your feelings, asking for help, or stating what you might need to complete that task.

Third, saying ‘no’ can help us feel empowered and self-confident. If you choose to say ‘yes’ to someone or something that will drain your mental and physical energy, you may find yourself angry or resentful towards that person, or even at yourself for agreeing in the first place!

Self-Care is the Bottom Line

Self-care and personal wellness mean putting our own needs first. You may have heard a flight attendant once say that in case of emergency, you put your oxygen mask on before anyone else’s. Why? Because if you don’t put yours on first, you won’t be able to help anyone else! It can be difficult to say ‘no’ to someone or something, but that feeling of difficulty will only last a few moments and will then fade away. Saying ‘yes’ to something you do not want to do can create both long-term and short-term negative thinking.

If you would like some help and guidance with self-care and assertiveness, contact Specialized Therapy Associates at (201)-488-6678. You can find out more about therapy and mind-body health by calling us or visiting our website at Specialized Therapy.

The post Self-Care Includes Saying ‘No’ When Needed first appeared on Specialized Therapy.

The post Self-Care Includes Saying ‘No’ When Needed appeared first on Specialized Therapy.

Addiction can result from and bring forth emotions and thoughts that are difficult to deal with. These emotions can drive an addict to behave in ways they later regret. It can be challenging to figure out how to act in opposite ways that have more positive outcomes. A question I often ask my own clients is: “Are your behaviors getting you to where you want to go?” If the answer is ‘no’ and it’s time to work on changing behaviors, then it’s helpful to get an idea of what your values are. Knowing what is most important or worthwhile for you will help keep you on track and guide your decision making in recovery.

You may be asking yourself, ‘How do I uncover my own values?’ The disease of addiction can cause a person to put aside or ignore values such as honesty or loyalty. You may have lied about your substance use many times to your family members or spouse for example. That doesn’t mean you don’t value these things! It means you are reconnecting with yourself and taking steps towards the life you want to live.

Value Categories

Consider value categories to help kickstart uncovering your own values. These categories include family, friendships, romance or intimacy, education, work (work ethic), honesty, respect, loyalty, health, community, faith, and sobriety. For each category, ask yourself what this means for you and come up with specific examples of each value’s meaning. Make a list of each value and each example. Take a moment to come up with examples of times you have acted on these values in the past, before your addiction. Use these examples as proof that you can act on these values again! Explore what kinds of changes you can make in your life now to respect your values. Identify values involved in any kind of choice you want to make and what behaviors could go along with those values.

For More Information

Specialized Therapy Associates provides a wide range of addiction recovery services for adolescents and adults. If you would like to find out more, please call the intake department at 201-488-6678, or specializedtherapy.com

The post Values and Success in Recovery first appeared on Specialized Therapy.

The post Values and Success in Recovery appeared first on Specialized Therapy.

Tips for Sobriety

First, evaluate where you are in your progress in recovery. Ask yourself if you are able to handle being around alcohol or other substances that may be present at summer events. Determine whether or not you have coping skills and strategies for relapse prevention planning to manage potential triggers.

If you feel you are struggling with relapse warning signs, or you do not feel prepared to cope with possible triggers, consider skipping the event or party. Attend a meeting, call sober support or sponsor, or engage in a healthy, enjoyable activity instead.

Second, evaluate the kind of event or party you will attend and who will be attending. If you are aware the party will be focused primarily on drinking alcohol or using drugs, consider skipping it. Otherwise, attend an event you are comfortable attending and consider bringing a sober friend with you to stay on track.

Third, have an escape plan if you want to leave the event early. Avoid being the designated driver for others, because you might then feel pressured to stay until the end of the party for your friends. Have your own plan for transportation or have a friend or family member available to pick you up if needed. Be aware of supports you can contact by phone including positive supports or a sponsor. Step away from the party and make a call when you need to.

Plan for Yourself!

Being in recovery doesn’t mean you cannot have fun! To succeed in your recovery, plan events and activities yourself in the summer that you can enjoy with your positive supports. Make active plans where the focus is on the activity rather than on substance use, such as biking, swimming, or hiking. These activities are enjoyable and rewarding! Over the summer months, make sure to continue to attend your meetings and consider getting support from a therapist.

More Information

If you would like more information on therapy or you want to make an appointment, contact Specialized Therapy Associates at (201)-488-6678.

The post Sobriety and Summer Parties: Tips for Success first appeared on Specialized Therapy.

The post Sobriety and Summer Parties: Tips for Success appeared first on Specialized Therapy.

A recent Forbes article reported about a study in the Journal of Social and Clinical Psychology which found that “social comparison,” making comparisons between ourselves and others, is the mediating factor between Facebook and depressive symptoms. In this study from the University of Houston, results showed that persons who used Facebook more frequently demonstrated more depressive symptoms. This doesn’t mean that Facebook or social media is the cause of depression! It can indicate that spending a lot of time on social media comparing oneself to others can result in depressed feelings.

Previous research regarding social comparison has shown that persons making upward social comparisons, such as looking at someone more attractive or popular that oneself, would make that person feel worse or sad. On the other hand, persons making downward comparisons, such as looking at someone less attractive or less popular then oneself, would make that person feel better or happier. Forbes reports that this current study in the Journal of Social and Clinical Psychology found that persons who used Facebook more frequently had more depressive symptoms, regardless of the direction of comparison (upward or downward).

In Summary:

To summarize, it is not social media itself which causes depression, but the way in which we compare ourselves to others which can lead to or worsen depressive symptoms. While cutting down on the use of social media can be helpful, the results of this study do not indicate that we should disconnect from all social media platforms. Instead, consider taking breaks from social media and social networking. When comparing oneself to others, consider the positives that exist in your own life and identify some people or things you can be grateful for. When examining other’s lives on social media, consider that what friends and peers post on social media will often be the happy and attractive parts of their lives, and that every person likely has more going on in their lives, positive and negative, than what is portrayed on social media.

If you would like more information about depression and counseling services, please contact Specialized Therapy Associates at (201)-488-6678 and check out our website at www.specializedtherapy.com.

The post How Social Media Influences Mood first appeared on Specialized Therapy.

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